


Mucky Boots

by Frasers_soulmate, tinadolphin



Category: due South
Genre: AU, F/M, Romance, Similarities to Alias Grace
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-02-16
Updated: 2018-02-16
Packaged: 2019-03-19 06:13:21
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,657
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13698501
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Frasers_soulmate/pseuds/Frasers_soulmate, https://archiveofourown.org/users/tinadolphin/pseuds/tinadolphin
Summary: This story was born out of a weird idea.After watching Alias Grace with an older Paul Gross, we were curious how Fraser would fit into the 19th century.And what if Meg wasn't his superior but his maid?Would it work?So we had a couple of days of brainstorming and this is what came out of it...





	Mucky Boots

Meg was on her hands and knees scrubbing the floor of the summer kitchen for the third time that week. She was working at a house in Richmond Hill just north of Toronto for the Fraser's, Benton and Victoria. Victoria was in family-way and even more at edge than she had been when Meg first started. 

Meg or Margaret Thatcher, from a middleclass family in the east outskirts of Toronto was the oldest of six siblings and when her father had died her mother had forced her to go look for a job to help provide for the little ones and that's how she ended up at the Fraser's.

"Don't put your mucky boots on my clean floor" Meg exclaimed when she heard steps outside. There were no answer and with a crossed look on her face she turned around and found her master standing in the big double doors. 'Oh my, it's my master and not the stable hand. He's so handsome my master, and kind, not at all like his wife' her thoughts went back to the first time she had seen her master. He had picked her up at the mercantile a horseride about half an hour away from the house. She still remembered how his handsome face had stunned her, not anything that she had expected.

"I'm so sorry, Sir" she stuttered and fussed with the hair that had come undone and at the same time started to get up so she could properly curtsey for him.

"There's no need for that Meg" Mr. Fraser said with a deep voice "You look fine just like you are" he smiled that way only he could with a glimpse of something mischievous in his eyes.

Just the Victoria showed up "What are you doing here?" she said to Benton and turned to Meg "Aren't you done yet? And for God's sake put your hair up" she then stamped straight into the summer kitchen with her ridingboots all dirty.

"Mrs. Fraser, please..." Meg began but was cut off by Victoria "Don't you ever call me that again" she said angrily and left the kitchen. Meg was hurt by her words but didn't say anything. She finished scrubbing the floor and then went on with making dinner.

After all her chores were done in the evening she sat down on the backporch to mend some tablecloths and the dresses Victoria had thrown at her earlier to "take out" as they didn't fit anymore. Beside her on the table she had her needles and threads and a cup of tea, she always felt more relaxed when she could have a cup of tea.

Victoria had rushed out of the house with a packed bag after dinner. Meg hadn't wanted to eavesdrop and even though Mr. Fraser had tried to keep a low voice Victoria had made up for it. What she had heard though and been puzzled about was Mr. Fraser's statement "You can do whatever you want Victoria, but that baby don't you dare to get rid of it! I will take care of it, I can't see another baby leave this family". Meg was puzzled, had they had another baby? When was this and why wasn't there any signs on a baby or child in the house, or had Victoria gotten rid of it as Mr. Fraser had said?

"You always keep busy don't you Meg?" Mr. Fraser came out to the porch and startled Meg, usually he went into his study or the library after dinner and late at night you could hear his footsteps up the stairs to the second floor where all the bedrooms were located.

"Oh yes, Sir, devil always finds work for idle hands to do" Meg replied and shyly looked up at her master, she folded the last dress and went on to the tablecloths.

"That's some work there" Mr. Fraser said, it was now long ago but he had seen his mother mend all kinds of fabrics in the house when he grew up.

"Thank you, Sir" Meg said and bent over the fine stitches she were working on.

"Do you mind if I sit down?" Mr. Fraser asked and nodded to the other side of the porch-bench.

"It's not my place to say were you can sit or not, Sir" Meg was very careful to always call him Sir, it was bad enough with the wrath of Victoria, and she really needed this job to send the money back to her mother, sisters and brothers.

"Victoria wasn't always like this you know..." he looked at Meg, again some strains of her hair had slipped loose form under her bonnet "She was a very young girl when I first met her"

"So you have known each other for a long time then" Meg said and almost at once regretted her words that implied that they should be old, well Victoria was a good six or seven years older than her and then Mr. Fraser was even older.

"You're quite outspoken Meg" Mr. Fraser said and Meg blushed "It's very becoming for a young girl to blush" he said charmingly.

Meg was finished with her last tablecloth and folded it neatly and reached for her cup of tea just to find it empty. "Here, let me make go fill that up for you" Mr. Fraser reached for the cup and their fingers touched and Meg let go of the cup so it fell onto the porchfloor and shattered into many pieces, at once she was on her knees to pick the pieces up "Please be careful" Mr. Fraser said.

Meg looked up at him "I'm so sorry Sir, you can take it out of my pay" she meant the broken cup "Don't you think about that" Mr. Fraser said "Now let me go get you a new cup with tea and we can sit here and enjoy the sun setting in the horizon"  
Mr. Fraser came back with a new cup of tea and his whiskey bottle to refill his glass. He carefully handed the cup to Meg "Be careful, that tea is hot" he then again sat down next to her on the bench.

Meg glanced over at her master "You were about to tell me about you and Victoria, Sir" she said. It was strange to call him Sir, but in the same time call Victoria by her name.

"So I was" Mr. Fraser looked at Meg "Well, the first time I met Victoria she can't have been more than eight or nine years old, she was my best friend in the army's little sister" he looked out into space "Yes she was a beautiful girl and I saw the pride when her brother talked about her, she didn't seem to bother him like I heard others say about their sisters" he told.

"And you Sir, do you have any brothers and sisters?" Meg boldly asked.

"Meg" he looked her straight in the eyes "Can I ask you to call me Benton?" Mr. Fraser said.

"That doesn't suit at all, Sir" Meg answered still curious hearing about his past. "Would you tell more about how you met Mrs. Fraser?" she then asked, feeling that she should address Victoria too with her proper title.

Mr. Fraser took a sip of his whiskey, stood up and leaned against one of the porch's wooden posts looking out over the backyard. "When we came back from the war, Victoria's brother and me, I stayed with them for a while, I had injured my knee badly you see" he turned around to look at Meg, still leaning against the post. "I ended up staying there for about a year, helping out around the place. Their father had died just before we came back. I think Victoria was around 9 years old by then"

"How old were you Sir?" Meg asked.

"I was 19 when we came back" he answered with a sadness in his voice "and 20 when I left Victoria alone with her brother, their mother had too passed away by then"

"Did you go back to your own family?" Meg was curious about this man's past. She had always found a serenity in listening to people telling about their past.

"I don't have a family" Mr. Fraser said "Not here at least" he added.

"When did you return to Mrs. Fraser and her brother?" Meg wanted to hear more of the story.

"I didn't" he said "I travelled around working here and there, playing poker and making some money. I came back to Toronto eight years later, Victoria was 18 by then and I found her in the mental hospital" he didn't look at her as he didn't want to see the shock and pity in her face. "I was told that Victoria had been forced to take a job as a maid at the old man that had bought their farm after her brother had taken his life. He just couldn't get over what he had seen in the war, it was really gruesome" he returned to sit down on the bench. "Victoria had been raped by the old man and when she had run away she had been taken in by the police and put into the mental hospital to have the baby. The baby had been put up for adoption. Victoria hadn't even wanted to see it when it was born"

Meg couldn't tell him that she had heard them argue earlier that evening but thought if that was why Mr. Fraser had said that he wanted to take care of her baby, apparently it wasn't even his.

"I had just bought this place and asked Victoria to come live with me, first she refused but when I told her it wouldn't be looked on with good eyes if she sought employment after having been in the mental hospital she agreed. I offered her to take my name" he told.

"Was that when you married her?" Meg slowly sipped her tea.

"We're not married" he confessed.

Meg was shocked and didn't know what to say.

"I took her in, let her use my name but there were no way she wanted to marry anyone" Mr. Fraser looked at Meg, surprised she was this quiet, she usually had some refreshing thing to say about any situation, a quote or something. "Did I scare you?" he asked softly.

Meg looked at her master "No, I'm just... I thought you were married and that the baby is yours" she said.

"So you know about the baby?" he asked her.

Meg blushed "I overheard you two after dinner when I was washing up" she said "Not that I was listening" she added.

"I believe you, I suppose it wasn't hard to hear, we can be a bit loud when we argue" he looked at her and took her hand "Did we scare you?" Meg just shook her head "Good, it will probably happen again when she comes back" he still hadn't let go of her hand "She always comes back" Mr. Fraser said.

They sat in silence as the sun set far beyond the farm, Meg got up to go inside and as she had gathered all her things and stood in the door she heard from the bench "It's not mine" she looked back at him. "The baby's not mine" Mr. Fraser looked at her with hurt in his eyes.  
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ 

The next day was Sunday and after breakfast Meg got ready for church. Mr. Fraser surprised her by having the horse(that he had introduced as Charlie her first day) and carriage ready and said he'd join her at church. Victoria was nowhere to be seen but the whole house had heard her come in some time during the night.

Meg had been to church a couple of times since she had started her job at the Fraser's but always alone and this time when she came in the company of Mr. Fraser people turned their heads. She heard them snicker and talk behind their backs. Mr. Fraser seemed not to mind, like he was used to it. After the service was over they went back to the house. 

“Do they always talk like that about you?” Meg asked boldly during the ride.

“Kind of, most people now know the truth about Victoria and it's not seen with good eyes around here” he answered.

“Why not?” Meg wanted to know since she thought he had done a chivalrous thing he had done taking care of Victoria and letting her use his name.

“Probably since they know we're not married and both live our own lives” Mr. Fraser said and glanced at her. “Maybe you should take care and not be seen too often with me either if you want to keep in their good books” he suggested.

“Thank you for thinking of me, but I learnt not to listen to gossip” she said with confidence in her voice.

“You are a peculiar young woman Margaret Thatcher” Mr. Fraser laughed.

At their return to the farm Meg went in search of Stan O'Brien, the stable boy, she needed him to kill a chicken for Sunday dinner.

Stan O'Brien, the stable boy, saw Meg come into the stall. She called for him. He replied that he was in the hayloft and she climbed up the ladder. He hid behind a haystack and waited. "Stan?" She called, he didn't answer. The hayloft has always been a bit scary to her. "Stanley, it's not funny!", she yelled but as she ran past him, he grabbed her by the arm and pulled her close. He tried to kiss her but she spat in his face and her coffee brown eyes sparkled angrily. "Let me go!" she hissed, "Or I'll kill you! I swear I'll kill you!" At first it looked like Stanley was scared of her, but then he just laughed and said," Come on, you want it too! Your Mr. Fraser doesn't seem to give you what you need. People say when he was in the war, it was not only his knee that was injured.” He pronounced Ben's name with a derogatory undertone and laughed maliciously.

At that moment they heard the stable door and Meg immediately recognized the steps that it was Mr. Fraser who entered the stable. She could hear his slight limp and thought for a moment what Stan had said. Stanley had also heard Mr. Fraser and pressed his hand quickly on her mouth so she couldn't scream. The only sound she managed was a squeal like a rat.

Mr. Fraser heard a noise in the hayloft as he brought the horse into the stable. The stable boy was nowhere to be seen, which annoyed Mr. Fraser. What did he pay the guy for? The sound was like the squealing of rats, and Ben thought that not even the cats he'd bought extra against the rats and mice were doing their job right. The stuff just can't do their job right these days, he thought and chuckled.

Meg managed to kick Stan on the shin and got loose, she ran for the wooden ladder that she had climbed up but just as she was going to turn around she felt Stan grab her from behind and drag her back to the haystack. “Let me go Stan” she started to cry “Please” she sobbed. 

“Not until I give you what you really want, I've seen how you've looked at Benton... or Sir, as you keep calling him” he said with a smirk on his face.

Meg was scared and had closed her eyes. None of them had noticed how Mr. Fraser had climbed the ladder and now he was pulling Stan away from Meg by the shirtcollar. He then landed a punch on his chin that sent the boy straight into the hay. He reached for Meg's hand to help her up all the time keeping his eyes on Stan “You're fired, immediately. Pack up your things and come see me in my office. You will get this month's pay but I never, and I mean NEVER want to see you here again”

Stan was angry with his master when he gathered his belongings. And he also was angry at Meg. He liked her a lot. She was beautiful and smart. Not a common appearance for a woman. She was also very young! Not even 18 and he wondered what she saw in an “old” guy like Fraser. It has to be his money she was fond of. And, well, of course this guy looked gorgeous too.  
The door to his chamber flew open and Victoria stood there. “What are you doing?”, she asked angrily. “Your caretaker just fired me.”, he answered. Victoria was surprised. “Why?” Suddenly an idea struck him. With an evil grin he said: “Because I caught him with the maid, this Meg. It seems he has a thing for her.”  
“What?!” Victoria’s eyes went wide. She couldn't believe it! This shameless girl! How did she dare….

Somehow Meg got down from the hayloft and ran into the house. She ran straight up to the small room that was hers, she had never been this scared in her life, and she had lived in the big city of Toronto after all. She didn't know how long time that passed before she heard a soft knock on her door. 

“Meg, are you alright?” she heard concern in Mr. Fraser's voice. “I've made sure that Stanely have left and I've taken care of a chicken for you to cook”

Mr. Fraser didn't know how much it hurt that he wanted life to just go on, but Meg was forever in his debt now so she straightened her clothes, put on her apron and bonnet. There were a few tendrils of hair hanging loose that she pushed under the soft fabric. She dried her last tears and went to open the door. “Thank you, Sir. I will go downstairs and cook it at once, dinner won't be too late” she referred to the incident having put her behind her chores.

Just then Victoria stormed out of her bedroom, she had been thinking of what Stan had told her and now when she saw Ben leaving Meg's room she got even more furious. “What is going on here?” she asked angrily “You fire one good stableguy and sleep with the maid?” she pushed Ben in the chest as Meg stuck her head out the door “And you, you're slut. I want you to leave immediately” her eyes was black with anger when she looked at Meg.

Ben took care of calming Victoria down, but as she had fallen in love with Stan she packed the most necessary things and when Ben was busy in his office and Meg was cooking she ran off. She hoped Stan hadn't gotten very far and she soon would catch up with him. What she didn't know was that Ben had seen her from the window when she left.

Ben was sad when he sat at the dinner table. Meg watched him while bringing the food in. He thought about this cute little girl Victoria once had been and what she had become when she grew up. He blamed himself for what had become of her. Maybe he hadn't taken properly care of her? Maybe he couldn't give her enough love and affection? She had missed it so much when her brother had died...

Meg didn't dare to ask him what's going on in his mind. He was still her employer at all and it wasn't her business. 

In the morning when the sun was rising, Meg looked out the window while preparing for the day chores and saw Ben saddle his horse. Then he rode into town.

Benton Fraser stood at the grave of his best friend.  
"I'm sorry, Harold.", he said sadly, "I was trying to take care of our little Victoria but I failed. I gave her all I could but it wasn't enough. Please forgive me for my failure. I know you believed in me. I always failed you and I'm truly sorry for it... Back in this horrible war, well, you know what happened. I have an eternal reminder with my bad knee and you? You had to take your own life as you couldn't stand it." Bashfully he wiped a tear from his face.

Back at the house Meg prepared lunch as she didn't know when her master was to come back. She took hers out to the back porch and sat down to eat. She saw the young neighbour boy and called him over “Hello Ray, do you want some lunch today?”

Ray lived with his parents and brothers just across the fields, he was 14 years old and always hungry “Yes please ma'am” he said politely.

“Just sit down and I'll go get you a plate” Meg said “You can wash your hands in the barrel over there” Meg pointed to a barrel at the corner of the house where they gathered rainwater to water plants and flowers with.

Ray helped Meg around the farm all day, he said that Mr. Fraser had come by their place in the morning. “He didn't say where he was going?” Meg asked the young boy, she was a bit worried as he still wasn't home and it was now close to five in the afternoon and Mr. Fraser had left before eight in the morning.

“Sorry Ma'am, I don't know” Ray said.

After Ray left Meg made herself a light meal and had something prepared for Mr. Fraser too if he would like something when he came home. He had barely eaten the previous evening, mostly drunk wine and Meg was worried he'd come home drunk. She had seen some of her friends' fathers come home drunk when she grew up.

It was well after midnight when she heard banging on the door and carefully she went down the stairs to find out that it was her master that had come home and as she suspected he was more than fairly drunk. “Oh my sweet Meg, you are such a beautiful girl” he said when she raised the lamp in her hand to take a look at him. Thank God he's not hurt she thought. Meg was lost for words. “You are awfully quiet tonight Meg” he smiled at her “I was thinking you would have something to say about the state I'm in” he grinned.

“It's not my place to judge, Sir” Meg said sweetly and offered him to lean on her “Let me help you up the stairs” she said.

“And to bed?” Mr. Fraser suggested. Meg didn't answer but she helped him into his bedroom and saw to it that he sat down on the bed before she helped him out of the boots. “You know Victoria used to do that, that was before she turned on me” he caressed Meg's cheek “You will never turn on me, will you Meg?” he asked. Still Meg didn't answer, she just helped him to lay down and when his head hit the pillow he was asleep.

Meg watched him sleep for a while. He had a frown on his face, even though he was asleep. She wondered what was bothering him so much. Was it about Victoria? Or because he caught Stan taking advantage of her, Meg? She wasn't even scared of his behaviour.

 

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Life past along nicely for the next couple of months, spring turned into summer, Ben with the help of young Ray and his brothers took care of the farm and Meg took care of the house, the only thing she still had a problem with was killing the chicken. One of those days that Ben came into the kitchen with one he teased her until he got her to say his name, they way she said Benton was so sweet. But Meg said she would only say it if they were alone. More often than not Ben now ate his dinner in the kitchen with Meg as he had evening chores to do. He didn't want the boys to come in the evening too, they were not old enough to be out late. Ben had thought of hiring a new stableboy but he was scared something would happen to Meg, they had become good friends by now.

Ben had regularly accompanied Meg to church on Sundays, even though people talked behind their backs they knew there were nothing to talk about. They worked side by side running the farm, the shared meals and maybe a up of tea in the evening on the porch before they went separately to bed. This Sunday though felt a bit different, it was like there was something in the air. Meg dressed up in her best dress, Ben had insisted on buying her a new one as a thank you for all the hard work she did for him, he even bought her a hat. Meg was dressed and ready when Ben brought Charlie out to put him infront of the carriage.

Church was no different than other weeks, the priest talked and talked all through his sermon, Meg noticed Ben being a bit unsettled and lent in to him and whispered “Do you want to leave?” he nodded his answer and quietly they got up. Meg heard some of the older women say something like “That's outrageous” about their behaviour but she didn't care. All since Victoria had disappeared, probably left with Stan Ben had been more sensitive to things, like he blamed himself for what had happened and he didn't want it to happen again. 

As every Sunday Meg got started on Sunday dinner when they got back and after having changed to other clothes Ben left by the backdoors to the stables only to stop dead in his tracks. “Meg, can you come here please” he said sounding shocked. Meg dried her hands on her apron and approached him slowly as he had picked something up from the backporch “What's that Benton” she said.

Ben looked straight at her “It's a baby”

“A baby?” Meg was shocked but looked into the worn basket and saw a sweet baby with big eyes and dark curly hair. “Who leaves a baby on your back porch?” she asked and followed him into the kitchen where Ben put the basket down on the table.

Ben didn't say what he suspected but saw how Meg reached for the baby who now was screaming. When she picked the baby up there was a note that fell out of the blanket. The blanket was also old and worn but scrubbed clean just as the basket was.

“Dear Ben, I'm so sorry for my behaviour, you have been ever so kind to me all the years we've known each other. I know I can't provide for my baby as you can and I hope you want to do this. I've called him Harold after my brother, I hope you will continue to do so. I'm sorry that I couldn't love you even if I tried but I always saw nothing more than an elder brother in you. It's not my place to tell you what to do, I hope you find someone nice to spend your life with, maybe you already have. I'm so sorry I accused you for sleeping with Meg, I know you would never do that, but maybe you could marry her, if she's still with you, and you can raise Harold for me. Yours truly, Victoria.”

Ben read the note for Meg and she blushed as she did when things got too personal. Then she looked down at the baby in her arms “So you are Harold” she said softly and smiled.

As Ben stood on the other side of the table he walked around it and looked down at the baby, it had Victoria's eyes, there were no doubt this was her child. Meg looked up at him “Was Harold your friend, or did Victoria have more brothers?” Ben shook his head “No, it was just Harold and Victoria. Do you remember I told you that Harold took his own life?” Meg nodded “That day I noticed Victoria had left I rode to see him... or well to his grave” he didn't say anything more, but Meg remembered how he had come home drunk that night.

“I know it's a lot to ask of you Meg, but I can't give this child away to some strangers, could you please help me. I will hire a nanny, or some other kind of help around the house” Ben pleaded.

Meg looked at the sweet baby, she too couldn't let anyone else bring this baby up, what if Victoria would come back looking for it and it wasn't even here “Yes Benton, I will help you with the baby”

“This changes everything” Ben said and looked at Meg again “I have asked Ray and his brothers along with their parents to look after this place for a few days next week. I thought I'd take you to Toronto and visit your family” he told her “But I don't know now, what will your mother say when we come with a baby” he paused “Because I'm not leaving the baby behind. It's bad enough his mother abandoned him”

Meg had to sit down, too many surprises made her knees go weak “Would you really take me to Toronto?” she said surprised.

“Of course I would, you've been away from your family for a long time. I've not been eavesdropping but I've heard you cry in your room when you've read letters you've received from your mother” he brought out a chair and sat down next to her. “Meg, I want to give you everything in the world. You've brought me back to life in a way I never thought I could” he had really planned on asking her mother first but things just felt right there and then “I mean it, I want you to marry me and we could give Harold here a few brothers and sisters”

"But...I can't marry my employer just because of a baby that's not even his...", Meg whispered, "You're still my..."  
"No!", Ben stopped her and took her hands in his. "Don't say that, Meg. Dear Meg, I don't want you to marry me because of the little one. I love you, Meg. And now I know that I did it since you came into my house. Let's make it our house, Margaret Thatcher, will you?"

Meg was in shock and didn't answer him. "We need a crib for little Harold." Meg said, practical as always. Ben nodded thoughtfully and rubbed his thumb over his eyebrow. "Well, you're right, my Meg, Ray's father is a carpenter, I will ask him tomorrow." 

Meg had helped her mother some with her younger brothers and sisters so she put the baby back in the basket and went to heat up some milk. “Do you know if there is a small enough bottle around the place, Sir?” she asked automatically calling him Sir and not Benton. Ben went in search for a small bottle enough and somehow Meg managed to give the boy some milk.

“I think it's probably for the best that Harold stays with me tonight” Meg said “He will need to be fed again in a few hours” Ben nodded in agreement “I will be in the office for a bit, just call me if you need any help”

Meg brought the baby upstairs in the basket and placed him in the middle of her bed, she needed to find some cotton rags to use as diapers, the note hadn't said when the baby had been born, but from Meg's experience she'd say he was around a month old. 

Meg didn't sleep much that night, Harold was fussy and not even the milk in the middle of the night made him settle in. Very tired the next morning Meg went down to the kitchen. 

Meg sat on the kitchen bench by the hearth with little Harold in her arms. The baby cried angrily because it was hungry. Meg tried to soothe him and rocked him in her arms. “Shh, don't cry, Harry. Your food will be warm in a minute.” The milk she heated on the hearth wasn't warm enough yet. The baby turned its little head and searched for Meg’s breasts. “I can't breastfeed you, I don't have milk.”, she said. She stirred the milk in the pot but it would take time to heat it. 

Harold cried louder and Meg sighed. She put her breast out of her clothing and let little Harry suck it. The baby immediately fell silent.

Ben had heard Harold scream from his office and wanted to see what had happened. He had to do some paperwork and wanted to do it in silence. He opened the kitchen door and was surprised for the first moment. Meg sat there with little Harry in her arms and the baby sucked on her breast.

Suddenly Ben felt aroused. He blinked a few times and felt his ears burning but he couldn't look away. Meg’s soft, firm and young breasts mesmerised him.  
“Oh dear.” he whispered and broke the spell. Quietly he shut the door and left Meg and the baby alone.  
Back in his office he couldn't concentrate on his paperwork anymore. He only saw this beautiful breasts in his mind’s eye.

When Ray and his brother arrived Ben asked the younger one, Tom, to go home and get his mother. He wanted her to come help Meg with the baby. Maria arrived an hour later and went straight into the kitchen where she found Meg in tears “My dear child, don't you cry” she said and reached for the baby. Meg sobbed and said “He won't stop crying, and he doesn't want the milk I try to give him” Maria was a wise woman having four boys of her own between the ages of five and fourteen. “I'm afraid he'll starve” Meg added. “Don't think that way my dear” Maria said as she gently rocked the baby “I will send our Ray into town, young Nancy just had a baby of her own a month ago and she will help us nurse him” Meg slumped down on a chair, it was like all the air left her and just then Ben came through the doors and rushed forward, scared she had fainted. Maria looked at her neighbour and his maid, there were something special about the way Ben cared for her, caressing her cheek and talking soothingly to her.

In the afternoon Ray came back with the horse and carriage along with young Nancy and her son. Nancy's husband had died a month before the baby was born and she was very poor, still she was nicely dressed in an old but worn dress. Her baby was clean and she had some clothes and other things with her. Immediately she sat down and nursed baby Harold, the boy sucked hungrily and was soon satisfied and fell asleep. Maria had helped Meg around the house during the day and in the evening everyone shared a meal in the kitchen of the Fraser's house. Ben had asked Robert to make both babies some simple cribs, as he had offered young Nancy to stay on as a nanny and help out with Harold, especially since she could share her milk between the babies.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ 

A couple of weeks later Ben, Meg, Nancy and the babies took the longer journey to meet with Meg's family, Meg had of course written to her mother and told about what had happened, all since Victoria had left until the new members of the household had come along. She had left out the news about that Ben had proposed that they'd get married. He had never brought it up again since that first night when Harold had been found on the back porch.

Ben knew from reading the address on the envelopes Meg sent to her mother that the family lived in Scarborough, it was quite a journey but not that far considering they had two babies with them. They had been travelling with the stagecoach and then walked the short way to Meg's family home. They were all welcomed with warmth and love and when introductions had been made and Meg and Nancy had settled into a small room to take care of the babies Ben sat in the kitchen and talked to Mary Thatcher.

“Mrs. Thatcher, I understand this is a very strange situation to understand” Ben started. 

“Oh, I've seen many constellations of families around here, I think you shall be very lucky you found young Nancy to help out, I know my Meg is a strong young woman, but taking care of a baby that's not your own isn't easy” she said. 

“Yes, your Meg is a very strong woman, the way she's helped around the farm and the house since she came to work for us” he knew Meg had told about how Victoria was a friend of Ben's “She made a big difference” he nervously rubbed his thumb on his eyebrow.

Mrs. Thatcher looked at him and poured some coffee “I think there is something more than just letting Meg visit with us that brings you here” she wasn't stupid, she knew a man in love and even though this gentleman was quite a bit older than her Meg she had seen how he looked at her, and even in the short time that afternoon noticed how Meg looked back at him.

Ben wet his lips with the tip of his tongue “Yes there is” he took a deep breath, how could he suddenly be this nervous, he's never been nervous in his life. “I have proposed to Meg that we'd get married” he said “She never really answered me, and now I want your blessing to ask her again”

Mary didn't know how to answer him, she really wanted to say 'Yes young man' but Ben was not many years younger than herself. “You are quite a bit older than my Margareth” she said “But I see that there is something between you, and from Meg's letters I know that you have a nice house and I understand that you can provide for her” she couldn't hide her smile “You have my blessing Mr. Fraser” she said.

“Thank you most kindly” Ben said “and please call me Ben” he offered and took out his wallet “I am going to get a room at the Inn, but I hope I can come here for dinner and with this” he handed over a considerate sum of money “I want to cover some of the costs” Mary started to protest but it hadn't been easy the last year since her husband passed away so she slowly reached for the money “I also want to ask you to help Meg buy a new dress and if she agrees to marry me I want to do it rather sooner than later” he added.

“Ben, this is so generous of you and I really hope Meg will be happy with you” Mary said.

After dinner Meg agreed to take a walk with Ben, it had felt nice to be home and not have to cook dinner for once, although she had helped out with this and that. “Why don't you show Ben around the neighbourhood a little” Mary suggested knowing there was a nice park not too far away and if it was right Ben would propose again.

Ben offered his arm to Meg and together they walked down the street, it was a nice September evening. Meg told Ben about who lived in the houses and what houses her friends had lived in. Some of them had moved away as their fathers had gotten jobs in other cities, some still lived there. Meg had had a best friend who just like her mother had been named Mary. Mary had died the year before Meg moved to Richmond Hill. “I know how you must have felt” Ben offered his condolences “It was hard news when I learnt that Harold had taken his own life” he said and saw a parkbench a bit ahead “Why don't we sit down over there?” he asked.

“My sweet Meg” Ben took her hands as they sat down. “You have come to mean so much to me, even more since Victoria dropped Harold off” he looked into her brown eyes “Do you remember I asked you that night to marry me and make the house ours, I'd love to fill it with our children, including Harold” he wet his lips with the tip of his tongue “Margareth Thatcher, will you do me the honour to become my wife?” he asked.

“Ben” Meg shyly looked him in the eyes “I...” she didn't know what to say.

“Please Meg, don't look at me as your employer anymore, you have become my best friend and I want to spend the rest of my life with you” he said.

“You are my best friend too” Meg agreed “Yes, I will marry you” she said and Ben pulled her into his arms for a warm embrace.

Everyone back at the house was thrilled by the news Ben and Meg brought back, Meg's brothers had come home too, they had both been working down at the docks. Both young men were impressed by Ben. Before Ben left to stay at the Inn, he had asked the name of their priest and convinced everyone that they were worth some new clothes, brothers and sisters alike, mother and even the nanny and of course the bride to be.

“You should have a red dress, like the one you had when we were little” her oldest little sister said.

“Oh yes Meg” her mother filled in “Red suits you”

When Ben woke up the next morning in the big bed at the Inn he felt alone, not that there had been any woman sharing his bed in a long time, but he knew Meg wasn't around the place, she was at her mother's. He got up and had some breakfast before he went to see the priest who agreed to marry them on Saturday, that was just three days away. Ben had to ensure the priest it wasn't because the bride to be was pregnant but they just didn't want to wait any longer. After all Meg had turned 18 two weeks previous.

He brought the news to the Thatcher house when he went there for dinner that evening. Meg was a bit resistant to the wedding being that soon, but she was happy that Ben wanted her family to be there. She had bought the most beautiful dress she had ever owned and it didn't even need any alterations.

“You shouldn't be that nervous, child.” Mary tried to soothe her daughter who was a bit anxious about the wedding. She wore her wedding dress and Mary helped her to make it fit.  
“I’m not nervous. … Well, you're right, mother. I am…” Meg sighed.  
“Do you love Benton, Margaret?”, her mother asked.  
“Oh, yes. I do. Honestly? I think I already loved him when I saw him the first time but he was my employer. It's ridiculous.” Meg chuckled.  
Mary Thatcher said: “He’s a good man. I just know it, Meg. And he have the money and the influence to make you a respected woman. I always wanted the best for my children and I assure you that Benton is the best for you. Don't worry, dear, he loves you. I could see it in his eyes. He has beautiful eyes.”  
Meg looked dreamy. “I know, mother. He’s the best I’ll ever get in life.”  
“And some more children, I hope.”, laughed Mary.

After the wedding ceremony Ben had arranged for a meal for them all at the Inn and after having said good bye to Meg's family who went back to the house, including the nanny with the two little boys Ben took Meg up the stairs to his room. He easily picked her up in his arms and opened the door to carry her over the threshold “I know it's not our home but tonight this is the closest to home we'll have” he carefully put her down and bent his head to kiss her. They had shared just a few kisses during the day, but Meg couldn't get enough of them.

Slowly Ben started to work on the buttons of Meg's dress, he pulled it off her shoulders, her pearly white skin was flawless. He bent down to kiss her neck “Your skin is so soft” he whispered and stood back “You're such a beautiful woman Meg” he smiled at her.

Ben lay her down on the bed. He leaned over her and kissed her gently.  
“You have no idea how long I longed for this.”, he whispered in a husky voice. “You did?”, she smiled. “Uh night.”  
He touched her breasts through her clothing and moaned. “Oh, Meg! Once I saw you in the kitchen with Harold. You're trying to breastfeeding him. I...I just got a glimpsee of your breast...well, umm...accidentally. But it mesmerised me for some reason..  
I’m still sorry for that but…”  
“Shh.” Meg laid her finger on his lips. “It's okay, love. I knew it. I didn't see you but I felt your presence. I always did.”

He undressed himself and laid down beside her. He ran his hands over her body, trying to prepare her for what was to come. It had been a long time but he felt his own body react to Meg's moans and the way she moved under his hands. Gently he moved on top of her and pushed himself inside her. Meg let out a cry. He stilled and let her adjust, but it had been so long and he loved the feeling of burying himself in a woman and he started to move. 

It had hurt, but not as much as she had thought. Ben had been as gentle as he could. Somehow Meg's instincts told her to move along with Ben and they found a steady rythm.

When Meg afterwards laid in Ben's arms she sighed and smiled “That wasn't so bad” she said boldly, in her mind she thought she could do it again, she had felt some kind of connection with Ben that she hadn't before.

“I'm happy you thought so, because I liked it very much too” Ben said and kissed her on the forehead, he closed his eyes and fell asleep. They woke again in the middle of the night and made love once more. 

The next morning Meg woke up early and got out of bed, she put on her petticoat and walked over to pull the curtains away from the window. She turned around and saw Ben laying spread over the bed partly covered with the sheets.

Around lunchtime Ben and Meg arrived at her familyhome. They had a happy lunch and Ben said that he'd soon hoped to see the family at the farm, they should not think about the money, he had more than enough and they were all family now. Ben, Meg, Nancy and the two little boys left so they should be home in the early evening.

Ben held his promise and carried Meg over the threshold of their home. Meg later mad a light evening meal for them all, Nancy who was now used to taking care of the two boys went about her things and joined Mr. and Mrs. Fraser in the kitchen when the boys were asleep. Having been married, even though a very short time, she told them that she'd take care of the dishes. Ben and Meg as many newly weds weren't hard to convince to do something else.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

On a bright starry night in the middle of June Ben and Meg's daughter Stella was born. Meg had been lucky with an easy pregnancy, even though Ben had said he wanted to employ some more people to help around the house Meg still wanted to cook and clean for herself and now that the boys were about a year old both of them Nancy had more time to do household things. Ben had employed a new stable boy since young Ray was to go off to university.

Meg heard how Ben was walking up to the kitchen and before he could enter she called out “Don't get your mucky boots onto my clean floor” she had a hard time to keep from laughing, this was now more a joke between them.

A month after Stella was born Meg woke up, her breasts were full and she knew Stella would wake soon for her midnight meal. It was a hot and humid night and she was alone in bed. Probably Ben had gone outside to cool off, he did that sometimes. Meg sat down in the rockingchair to nurse her babygirl. She had on a cute nightdress that Meg's mother had brought. She also had brought the old Christening gown of the Thatcher family. They were to have the Christening in about two weeks and Meg was happy that all of her family would come for the happy occasion.

Meg heard voices from outside and got up to see who it was, to her surprise it was Victoria.

“What are you doing here?” Meg heard Ben ask.

“I'm sorry to turn up like this, I just wanted to leave you this note” Victoria said. 

“And what is it about, why do you think we would care what you would like to say a year later” Ben's voice was angry.

“I'm ever so greatful that you took Harold in, and I heard in town today that you just had a baby of your own. I wish you all the best” Meg heard that there was a difference in Victoria's voice, something softer.

“Yes we did” Ben said with pride, Stella was the star of his eye.

“I just wanted you to know that we'll be moving west to Vancouver, Stan's gotten an offer for work there” Victoria explained.

“Alright” Ben said. 

“I know I hurt you, you were always so kind to me, taking care of me after Harold had died and I was in that awful place” she didn't want to say hospital. She slowly started to leave.

“Victoria” Ben called and she turned around “Be happy” he said and felt a sudden need to get inside. He needed to be close to Meg, to tell her what had happened if she was awake as she usually was at this time of night nursing Stella.

Up in the bedroom Meg got back to bed after putting Stella in the crib, they had gotten a beautiful crib from their neighbours, this time Robert had had more time to make one. He had painted it white for the young and innocent child. Maria had made lovely beddings to have in it in bright summer colours.

Ben gently slipped into bed and put his arms around Meg. “That was Victoria, wasn't it?” she asked “Yes, did you hear us?” Meg nodded “Then you know what she wanted and I told her to be happy” Ben said. “Just like we are” Meg smiled and lent forward to kiss him.

© Any resemblance to Alias Grace is purely for your pleasure, all copyrights for that belongs to Margaret Atwood and Sarah Polley(for the tv-series). resemblance to Due South belongs to Alliance and are too for your pleasure. This is a co-written story from Frasers_soulmate and @tinadolphinsb 2018 and forward


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